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What would you do with a Sasquatch?
Tuesday, April 14, 2009 / PowerMax Culture
We plan on providing more videos of Max’s hijinks (aka Maxjinks), especially since the big galoot can’t walk through a room without knocking something over (although he’s no longer choking copiers to death with butt hair, and we haven’t had to clean blood off the ceiling for quite some time).
A relative of Max maybe?
*In case you’re a little lost check out the back story on Max the Sasquatch…
We’ve even put him on the phone from time to time, mostly to growl at cold-call telemarketers and people trying to get a refund for a price drop on a product they bought a year and a half ago. But, alas, we’re at a bit of a loss as to how to keep him busy all day without his accidentally destroying something.
So we ask you – if you had a Sasquatch, what would you do with him? Submit your idea here and maybe – just maybe – with enough peanut butter and Twinkie sandwiches we can get him to act out some of your crazy ideas.
Don’t be shy! We’d love to hear your ideas on what you’d do with the big fella… Please leave a comment below and we’ll see if Max is up to the task. Don’t expect to see everyone’s ideas here – we’re keeping them all secret.
If we use your idea we’ll send you a free iPod nano! So get those ideas in there!
July 20th, 2009 at 7:07 am
I would love to see Max dancing with the Stars…OK maybe just dancing with an ipod.
October 4th, 2009 at 8:28 pm
I’d teach Max to knit scarves out of all that loose fur that he leaves around. You could use all those hand-knit scarves for Christmas gifts.
October 6th, 2009 at 1:16 pm
Mr. Sasquatch seems like the type of hominid that gets bored rather quickly. It seems just after a few episodes, “Squatch” has exhausted the gimmick and can’t rely solely on his good looks to keep things rolling and keep the fickle viewing audience appeased.
Therefore I am writing to you today in hopes you can consider a few of my ideas to keep the hairy hominid from molesting the copy machine further.
Something tells me that Squatch really wants to follow his calling and:
-Produce/Direct several movies about the adventures of the humans working at PowerMax.
-Squatch should of course receive his 15 minutes by being on-camera talent perhaps walking us through the departments on PowerMax. Who knows, maybe Squatch is the next Huell Howser. Although Squatch can only growl and grunt, we all understand what he means when there’s subtitles.
-A few field trips with Squatch could be fun….even if its only to the parking lot at Power Max. Nothing is spared at Power Max, and everything is sacred.
-I like the angle of the lead sled dog spokesperson for Power Max, although we do need to see more of Squatch. Perhpas Squatch can assist employees with their issues from simple sales calls to order fulfillment to management meetings.
Squatch has been with Power Max long enough that I do have a few questions….
Does he have his own parking space? If so, what does he drive?
Does he have his own office? I’m sure that the warehouse has become quite boring and gets cold.
Since his role is more involved at PM, what size suit is he required to wear, and does he participate in casual Fridays?
Lastly…. the hominid’s gotta be horny after all these years. It may be time to introduce another character to the story of Power Max, pull some heart strings, and most of all….give Squatch that needed noogie. Discretion of course should be paid on how that story is told but you get the idea.
Okay, gotta get back to work. Thanks for listening.
Rock on Squatch!
October 27th, 2009 at 7:49 pm
You need to integrate max with what macs do best. Have max try to make his own action movie (that fails miserably), or have him try to paint, photoshop, do a theme song thing, etc or a combination of them.
February 8th, 2010 at 5:59 pm
Very simple. Call my boy Steve A. to open up a can of bionic whoop-ass on that hairy varmint.
-OG, OSS
October 12th, 2010 at 8:11 am
Having Max get caught listening to embarrassing pop music on his iPod and dancing/singing like no one is around.
If in the office have a glass door or window so someone catches him, in a car have him stop at a red light and a co-worker or person drive up next to him and see.
It’s happened to everyone and Max can be no exception!
March 26th, 2011 at 11:56 am
Let Max handle a few PowerMax deliveries. Perhaps a free back rub to select customers with orders over $100. The possibilities are endless.
April 22nd, 2011 at 3:13 pm
How about let max deliver a free imac computer to someone…say, me. I would answer the door, scream but then realize that its max and invite him in for a snack and let him hook up the computer. After he was done, he would discover that I had a female bigfoot in my backyard. They would fall in love, get married and have kid bigfeet. It could be a 2-4 part series……it could happen!
thanks, chris
November 20th, 2011 at 6:21 pm
I would put Max in a Yellow Lamborghini and drive him down Hollywood Blvd. Then take him back to Powermax and make him do tricks on pay per view.
November 21st, 2011 at 10:16 am
If I had a sasquatch. I will make him to help me to shovel the snow. Help me to get rid of lice in someone hair(they must pay), Be a bodyguard(Imagine a black hairy big guy walk at my back, no one will be messing around), and maybe I go to New York, set up the show said “The Sasquatch Return” and in MSG or Radio City Hall?It will be very cool, and a lot of people will be come and it will making a lot of money I guess.
Then the Sasquatch might be famous and get into Hollywood movies and I can be a manager.